What's Real?

One of the things that's most fascinating about having kids is seeing the acquisition of culture, including pop culture, at play in real-time. Now my kids (seven-year old twins), as long-time readers may recall, are, how you say? Scaredy-cats. They have a history of finding any kind of drama, or conflict, too intense too deal with. When we saw Tangled, they both spent about half the film with their heads buried in our chests.

And yet sometimes movies I would expect to be far too intense turn out to ones they like. A few months back, on a Sunday afternoon, E.T. happened to be on HBO, and Twin B and I caught it about a third of the way in. I was expecting to have to turn it off, especially as we neared the "E.T. gets sick and dies" stuff, and yet she was engaged throughout--without any of the "turn her head away from the screen" behavior I was expecting.

Now, just last week, on a lazy Sunday morning, I put one of my all-time favorite movies on the good 'ol Netflix Streaming--The Iron Giant. If you haven't seen it, The Iron Giant is a great, great movie, the directorial debut of The Incredibles' and Ratatouille's Brad Bird. It's a fun movie about a boy befriending a giant metal robot form outer space, but it's also a deeply moving film about what it means to carve your own destiny, and how no one can tell you the kind of person you are--you get to decide. Gorgeous old-school animation, an exciting climax, the movie has it all.

They hated it.

Well, maybe not hated. But they were, if not as scared by it as, say, Tangled, uneasy. And in the end it was just not something they liked. Which of course was deeply disappointing to me as a big nerd. And yet intriguing in a way, as it illuminated for me how adult, in a sense, so much of the film, and its themes, are. Maybe it's not really a kids' movie. Maybe it's too deep for a seven-year old.

Or maybe they just didn't like it.

Another thing that fascinates me is how they process the reality of a film. It's taken some explaining to get across the idea that a movie isn't real. I still remember watching just a little of Spider-Man and explaining to my daughter, with the remote pausing and rewinding multiple times, how they mix an actual man in a Spider-Man costume with a cartoon of Spider-Man drawn on a computer to get the effects they want.

And yet she still sometimes needs reassurance that things are not "real." This evening, watching a bit of Home Alone, she wanted to make sure that the little boy wasn't "really" alone. So I explained to her that in real-life he wasn't alone--that there was, indeed, a man right in front of him holding a camera. And she seemed to get it.

I like explaining some of the tricks this way, showing the girls how movies get the effects they see--and that sometimes frighten them. I think it helps, and it feeds a natural curiosity that I love. And yet sometimes I wonder if I should do a little less of it. Let some of the magic keep as magic. As mystery. If only for a little longer.

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I Am a Cliche

You guessed it. The de riguer hiatus. In the past few weeks I've started to post several times before giving up. Not really sure why, but can no longer pretend that the feeling of burn out isn't real. So, rather than fight it, I've decided to give into the ennui and take a break. A few months is what I'm thinking now, but who knows. In the interim, feel free to e-mail me at tosyandcosh@hotmail.com or follow me on Twitter (tosyandcosh).

Happy summer to all!

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I Sound Like I’m From Joisey. Who Knew.

If you are not listening to the all-cover songs, all the time podcast Coverville, well than there’s no hope for you. Brian Ibbitt puts together a roughly thrice-weekly show full of cover songs, with pretty much each show unearthing a great cover you probably never heard before.

As part of his “request” shows, Brian features a “musically challenged” trivia contest, in which listeners record and send in short music trivia games that Brian (along with wife Tina) compete in. And in the current episode, the “musically challenged” is a submission by Tosy and Cosh.
Go over and have a listen. But more importantly, go over and subscribe. You won’t regret it.

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Logo

For the curious, the sources for the letters in the new logo are:

T - Star Wars logo.
O - The one true ring from The Lord of the Rings films
S - Shawshank Redemption film poster
Y - Playbill masthead

And - From the Broadway Beauty and the Beast logo

C - Classic Captain America logo
O - The good Captain's shield
S - The original Sweeney Todd Broadway logo
H - The Simpsons

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The Power of Movies

I watched Monsters, Inc. with my twin five-year old daughters over the past few nights, and in the process was very strongly reminded once again of how powerful movies can be. For me, there are two moments at the end of Monsters, Inc. that tear at my guts – when Sully returns Boo to her bedroom, and has to say goodbye to her for the last time, and the very last moment in the film, when he is gifted with a way to see her again, and he eagerly and tentatively opens her door to see her.

As we watched these last moments, I had one of my daughters on my lap (the Wife had the other). And, as that first moment played out, I was keenly watching my daughters react to the moment, to see how they took it.

Of course, the moment has two levels superimposed on top of each other. The first is the happy ending moment – after many close calls, the child is being returned to her home (and unseen parents) after her big fantasy adventure. She’s like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz. But the second—and it’s this moment that the scoring and direction and actors play up—is a very sad thing, with Sully and the little girl realizing that they will never see each other again. The Wizard of Oz has this level going on as well, with Dorothy’s farewell to her friends, but there it’s not nearly as heartbreaking as it is here. It’s all a matter of perspective. In Oz, we identify with Dorothy, she’s our protagonist. But here, it’s Sully, and so it’s his loss we feel.

Twin A took the moment on that first level. She had expressed real fear several times throughout the film that the little girl would never find her way home. So seeing that happy ending was exactly what she had been anxiously awaiting.

But Twin B saw through to the other level, the level on which the scene has always hit me hard. And because she was in my lap I could see her react up close, and it was, well, astonishing. As the import of the scene hit her – Sully would never see Boo again – her eyes welled up and her breath started to hitch and constrict. But she wasn’t upset. She didn’t turn away. She stared, completely enraptured by the turn the story had taken. In a small, choked voice, she said “he loves the little girl.” She had been emotionally moved by the film, yes, but not in a scared way, or a disturbing way. She had been moved, and emotionally ensnared, in exactly the way the filmmakers intended.

So, when that last shot came, when it was revealed that Sully would get to see Boo again, the payoff was there. She gazed at the screen with a look of complete and open joy. She was as happy as he was. She had been surprised and delighted and taken quite out of the world of our Sugar Maple Split and into another place entirely.

And that's the power of movies.

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My New Toy

For the last year or two, we have been toying with the idea of buckling under and buying a flat-screen TV. But it's only in the last month that I started doing serious research. Here's what I found:

If your screen is under 50 inches, the difference between 720p and 1080p is vanishingly small. We ended up going with a 40 inch for our family room (which, while not small, is set up in such a way that the TV and couch are only 8 feet apart.) I was a bit worried that the 40 would be too small. My worries were baseless. The 40 inch is very sizable and perfect for the room. The 46 inch truly would have been a bit too big.

I do not like the color on the Sony TVs. Something about it is a bit neon, a bit oversaturated and artificial. I love the color on the Samsungs.

After much back and forth, we settled on wanting a Samsung, not caring about 1080, and perfectly happy with a 40 inch and not a 42 (Samsung doesn't make an LCD 42, and as our family room is bright, with a big slider to the backyard in the back, a plasma would have far too much glare.)

We ended up with the Samsung LN40A450, which seems to be being clearanced. We got ours for $698 at 6th Ave.

Set up was a breeze. We picked up a very cabinet on floor sample clearance at Fortunoff, which made dealing with the wires and such easy. One HDMI cable between the cable box and the TV. Another between the TV and DVD player. And the output audio RCA jacks from the DVD player to the stereo. The cabinet even has doors for the speakers, so they are nicely tucked away. It also has an iPod dock on the top, with a cable that also goes to the stereo. No more tape adapter to play the iPod.

So far we have watched a few Dexter episodes on DVD, and the quality is great. As is the HD channels we've watched (mostly news.) I can't wait for new episodes of my favorite shows so that I can see them in HD.

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The Power of Story

For the last month or so, I've been reading The Wizard of Oz (the original Baum novel) to my four-year-old twin girls. Both girls have a history of being skittish about conflict in stories--they watched Cinderella for a while but then got too distressed at the meanness of the step-sisters as they tore the dress. They watched Finding Nemo but after a while couldn't take the dentist scene. And they were very nervous about Beauty and the Beast because of, well, the mean Beast.

They were OK with Dorothy landing on the Witch of the East. Probably because the actual conflict takes place off-stage. Dorothy realizes what happened after. And in the book, the Witch of the West doesn't show up in Munchkinland. They were a little nervous about there being another witch out there, but OK. And they digged the addition of the friends and their very clear goals - Scarecrow wants a brain, Tin Man wants a heart, and Lion wants some courage.

When we started the book, I explained the idea of a chapter book, describing how long it would take to read it. I told them how many chapters and pages there were. Weeks later, we were reading the chapter before they get to the Emerald City. And when I told them that the next chapter, chapter 12, was when they would get there, they were surprised. Because they knew that there a lot more chapters to come. And they thought Dorothy and friends getting to Oz would be the end of the story.

Before that point, they had been cooling off on the book. After all, they knew a witch was coming. But now, they are excited. Because there's been a twist. Because they've been surprised. The wizard didn't give Dorothy and the Scarecrow and the Tin Man and the lion what they wanted. To get what they want, the foursome will have to face the witch. And the girls are very excited to see what happens next.

Stories are remarkable things.

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Teetotaling

In a comment to this post, Jaquandor asked why I don't drink. I put this in the comments there, but thought it bore posting on its own.

If you gave me a big bowl of M&Ms, I would eat the whole thing. Now, about a third of the way through, I wouldn't WANT anymore M&Ms. But they would still be there, and so I would still eat them.

Based on this little bit of self-knowledge (and a little bit of family history), I have always suspected alcohol and I should not mix. And we never have. In 34 years, my total alcohol consumption comprises:

• A sip or two of beer as a kid (thought it was gross)
• A sip or two of wine as a teen (thought it was OK)
• A shot of cherry brandy foisted on me after shoveling the driveway of my wife's kindly Greek landlords before we were married.

And that's it. I feined sipping the champagne toast at my wedding, my sister's wedding, and my father's wedding. Such hardcore abstinence may well be overkill. But I'm fine with never finding out.

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The Plug Is Being Uncoupled

Tosy and Cosh are taking a very unplugged vaction, for a good two weeks or so. We'll be back in late July.

Happy Summer!!

How White Am I?

Roger points me in the direction of the funny social commentary at Things White People Like. And, inspired by the non-white Roger's admission of liking some of these ostensibly dorky things, I thought I'd catalogue which of the things white people like I like. So:

#81 Graduate School
Yes. I have an MA in English and I'm not sure why. I started it because my company at the time was paying for it. But I only took one class before leaving for greener (but less tuition-reimbursement-happy) pastures.

#80 The Idea of Soccer
No. Never played it and don't particularly care for it, or that America is seemingly alone in not loving it.

#79 Modern Furniture
No. Ick. I like classic or old-fashioned furniture. Amish-made, solid, handcrafted stuff. Hate modern furniture.

#78 Multilingual Children
No. I've nothing against kids learning more than one language, but don't feel passionately that they must.

#77 Musical Comedy
Lord yes. As any regular reader knows.

#76 Bottles of Water
Ugh. I hate buying bottles of water. Very silly thing to do, unless one is thirsty and there is no convenient supply of tap available (at a park, say, where the pretzel guy has water but there are no fountains.). That being said, I hate water. So . . . flavorless.

#75 Threatening to Move to Canada
Nah. Like any good American I get frustrated by the guvment, but never enough to threaten leaving.

#74 Oscar Parties
Yes. Never been but love the idea in theory. If the Oscars were on a Superbowl timeframe, I;d have one. But a Sunday party at 8? Just doesn't work.

#73 Gentrification
No. I'm a suburb guy.

#72 Study Abroad
No. Never saw the draw.

#71 Being the only white person around
No. Sad to say, but I have no compulsion to travel to China and eat in a restaurant where I'm the only pale whitey there.

#70 Difficult Breakups
No. Never dated much, frankly.

#69 Mos Def
No. He was OK in Hitchhikers Guide; other than that, I'm nonplussed. Oh wait - I did very much like his "America" on the West Wing finale.

#68 Michel Gondry
Yes. Well; Sunshine and John Malkovich. Don't think I've seen any others.

#67 Standing Still at Concerts
Yes. But that's because I dance like a, well, white guy.

#66 Divorce
No. Not fun.

#65 Co-Ed Sports
Sure - it's fun to play with the wimmin folk too.

#64 Recycling
Yes. But I'm not much of an evangelist for it.

#63 Expensive Sandwiches
Yes. Guilty as charged. I love a fancy samwich, with sun-dried tomatoes, and high-falutin' mayos.

#62 Knowing What’s Best for Poor People
No. I don't pretend to know what it's like to be poor, or the best way for poor people to stop being poor.

#61 Bicycles
Of course. Who doesn't like a nice bike ride. And for kids they're indispensable.

#60 Toyota Prius
Nah. I'm a "buy used and drive it into the dirt" kind of guy.

#59 Natural Medicine
An emphatic no. I'm a hard science guy; no quakery for me, thanks.

#58 Japan
No. No interest in going, and don't have any real interest in Japanese films, music, comics.

#57 Juno
Yes. Thought it was great.

#56 Lawyers
No - not if it can be avoided. That it takes a lawyer to buy a house irks me to no end.

#55 Apologies
Yes. I apologize often.

#54 Kitchen Gadgets
Yes. And I take the extra-bleached step of never actually using them.

#53 Dogs
Yes. Cute and good companions.

#52 Sarah Silverman
Yes. I'm not a huge fan, but she makes me laugh.

#51 Living by the Water
Oh yes. A dream of mine - a big ol' vacation house on a lake in New Hampshire.

#50 Irony
Of course. It's hard-wired.

#49 Vintage
No. I hate old stuff. Clothes, antiques. none of it.

#48 Whole Foods and Grocery Co-ops
No. too much work and not worth the price. I shop at a regular grocery store and shop sales.

#47 Arts Degrees
The aforementioned MA has me guilty.

#46 The Sunday New York Times
Yes. In theory. In practice, I read some of the front and sports pages, much of the arts section, and hope the magazine has an article I'm interested in.

#45 Asian Fusion Food
No. Haven't tried it, at least.

#44 Public Radio
No. I tried This American Life on podcast and got bored.

#43 Plays
Yes. I do have a BA in Theater Arts.

#42 Sushi
No. Bland and non-filling.

#41 Indie Music
No. Too much to wade through - I need a bigger filter.

#40 Apple Products
Yes. But I haven't switched from a PC yet.

#39 Netflix
Yes; but I switched a few years back to its cheaper copycat, Blockbuster online, to take advantage of a cheaper price and in-store rentals.

#38 Arrested Development
Yes, but haven't gotten around to season two yet.

#37 Renovations
Yes; not that we've gone down that road yet. But the idea of adding to my house is appealing.

#36 Breakfast Places
Yes. I LOVE a good breakfast place. I miss the Le Peep in Morris County terribly.

#35 The Daily Show/Colbert Report
No. On too late, and on too often to TiFaux.

#34 Architecture
No. Boring as hell.

#33 Marijuana
No. Never tried, never will.

#32 Vegan/Vegetarianism
No. Meat is just too good.

#31 Snowboarding
No. Too expensive.

#30 Wrigley Field
No. Never been to Chicago; and if I do go, I won't be stopping by. Don't care about the Cubs.

#29 80s Night
No. The 80s music that gets played is mostly the bad 80s music.

#28 Not having a TV
Never. I LOVE TV.

#27 Marathons
Yes; in theory. I have a bad knee (and I am lazy). But I ran cross country in high school and always wanted to run a marathon one day.

#26 Manhattan (now Brooklyn too!)
No. I like the occasional visit, but mostly I'm happy in the suburbs.

#25 David Sedaris
Yes. Funny.

#24 Wine
No. I'm a teetotaler.

#23 Microbreweries
No. Ibid.

#22 Having Two Last Names
No. Confusing. And where does it end? If I give my daughter two last names and she marries one day and wants to hyphenate . . .

#21 Writers Workshops
No. I didn't find the workshop aspect of my writing classes all that useful.

#20 Being an expert on YOUR culture
No; I'm an expert on no cultures, and make no pretensions otherwise.

#19 Traveling
No. Expensive. Sure, there are places I'd like to see one day, but not tons of them, and I may never get to see them.

#18 Awareness
No. Awareness is overrated.

#17 Hating their Parents
No. My parents are all right.

#16 Gifted Children
Yes. I do fervently hope that my kids will turn out gifted. And yes, I know this is dumb.

#15 Yoga
No. Beyond my ken.

#14 Having Black Friends
No. Although, I don't have many friends, period, being something of an introvert.

#13 Tea
No. I like a cup of tea fine, but that's about the extent of it.

#12 Non-Profit Organizations
No. I'm pretty apathetic, is the truth of the matter.

#11 Asian Girls
No. I'll admire a pretty Asian girl as much as a pretty white girl, but have no special affinity.

#10 Wes Anderson Movies
No. I liked Tanenbaums and Rushmore fine, but that's about it.

#9 Making you feel bad about not going outside
Yes. I get cabin fever pretty quickly, and look in suspicion on those who don't like being outside.

#8 Barack Obama
No. Not in love.

#7 Diversity
No. Just can't get too worked up about it.

#6 Organic Food
No. Not worth the price.

#5 Farmer’s Markets
No. Ibid.

#4 Assists
As a Net and Kidd fan, yes.

#3 Film Festivals
No. My tastes tend towards the populist, not the super-arty.

#2 Religions their parents don’t belong to
No. Not a fan of religion at all.

#1 Coffee
A thousand times yes. I am well and truly addicted.

My final tally? 28 Ayes and 53 Nays, which makes me only 35% white. Not sure what it makes me 65% of though.

Until Whenever

Still Breathing

In case you were wondering.

I am live-blogging from a war room. A room they won't let me leave. But tomorrow. Tomorrow. The project is over.

Freedom!!!

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. . . And a Happy New Year!

Thought I'd squeeze in a few posts before I take off for a mostly computer free Christmas break, but it ain't looking likely. So consider this a belated light-to-no posting notice, and I'll see you all in the New Year.

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Survey Says . . .

Just a quick note to highlight the survey on the right - trying to get a sense of what the folks who stop by here like and don't about Tosy and Cosh. Feel free to comment here as well.

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I Know No One Cares

But I can't help myself.

My Rock/Pop collection boils down to this:

5-Star - 403 songs, 12%

4-Star - 922 songs, 27%

3-Star - 1,822 songs, 54%

2-Star - 156 songs, 5%

1-Star - 55 songs, 2%

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Motivation (Update)

I took down the graph, as I couldn't figure out how to make it readable. Instead, I'll just post several days' weigh-ins in that space. I still encourage all to call me names if those numbers start to slip, though.

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Motivation

Take a quick look to your right. Tosy and Cosh, since 9/4, have been trying to eat better and exercise in an effort to lose weight and improve overall weight. Why? Because, at 5'11'', Tosy and Cosh are overweight, and Tosy and Cosh would like to be able to do things like play basketball and baseball with their kids. Without, you know, feeling like a lung will soon be aspirated into the air. So - the graph. I've been keeping track of progress on a simple bar graph as a motivational tool. And, I figured if I put it up here, in public, and let others look at it - and gave others the opportunity to berate me if I start sliding, or stop posting it out of embarrassment, well that can only help. So, if you see that thin red line start to tick upwards, please feel free to chide me most vehemently. I will deserve it.

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End-of-Summer Hurrah

As has become tradition, Tosy and Cosh are taking the rest of the summer off, to eat too much, get too much sun, and spend too much money. Have a great late-summer; we'll see you in September!

Until Whenever

Sad

Q: How pathetic is it that I was truly impressed with myself for the below?

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 10/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

A: Very.

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A Brief Respite

Tosy and Cosh are taking a short holiday; expect radio silence for a good week or so.

Until Whenever

Questions for Me!

Jaquandor has kindly offered to provide tailored questions for interested bloggers. Always a whore for free content, I happily signed up! Jaq's 5 questions for me:

1. Name your single favorite Rick-and-Lily moment from Once and Again. (Define this as both of them on screen at the same time.)
Small moment category: Second season episode, when Rick and Lily decide to move in together. The way they slyly grab hands in a quiet celebration of victory after deliberately egging the four kids on in a successful attempt to get the mixed brood to bond together as a mutual front against the parents. I love how the moment cements Rick and Lily's ability to work together as parents and to recognize that managing four kids under one roof will take some real strategizing. It's the moment when i believed they could work as parents of four.

Big moment category: Second season episode, when Rick bottoms out after losing his reputation and business in the wake of the Drentell meltdown. The way Lily refuses to let Rick push her away, and the way she insists to him that she loves him, not in spite of his faults, but because of him, because she loves the whole package. When he breaks down in her arms . . . how Campbell never won an Emmy I'll never know.

2. How bad is the Jersey Turnpike, anyway?
Not too. Up North, where it runs into 78, by Jersey City Elizabeth, et al, it's very industrial, with lots of foul-smelling factories surrounding it, and not pleasant at all to drive. But in Central and South Jersey it's just another big highway, with lots of sound barriers, rest stops, and odd bits of scenery. I always get the impression that folks think all of the Turnpike - and by extension all of New Jersey - is like the 20-mile or so stretch of industrial dourness they have in their heads. It's not.

3. You get a paid weekend trip to someplace of your choice, as long as it's within a three-hour drive of your home. Where do you go? (For our purposes, NYC is out!)
Three hours knocks my favorite place to go, the White Mountains region of New Hampshire, out of the running. So I may just turn to Cape May whose gorgeous Victorian bed and breakfasts are typically out of our price range. Great shopping, beautiful streets for walking, a gorgeous, quiet beach, big old-fashioned hotels, and fabulous outside dining. Yes, that would do just fine.

4. If you and your wife have some kind of "renewal of the vows" thing with a "reception" after, what song will be your new "first dance"?
New? Why new? I strongly suspect we'd stick to what got us here in the first place - the lushly romantic and silky Nat King Cole version of Gershwin's "Our Love Is Here to Stay."

5. You may have written on this before, but I don't recall, so what's your take on Andrew Lloyd Weber? Great Broadway artist, or peddler of annoying spectacle?
I haven't, and it's a good question. My answer is neither. I adore early Lloyd Weber, and count Jesus Christ Superstar and Evita as landmark scores. The man's remarkable gift for melody is simply undeniable, and I think discounted far too easily and often. That being said, he has a weakness for sloppy lyricists (when that sloppy lyricist is also gifted and imaginative, as is the case with Tim Rice, the sloppiness can be somewhat forgiven; when he's a mushy hack (hi Don Black!), not so much), and going for the big, sweeping sentimental gesture more often than is wise. And his later work (or, at least what I'm familiar with) can be too digestible for its own good. But he has had an indelible impact on musical theater, both good (Les Miserables, Chess) and bad (Lestat, Jekyll and Hyde).

That was fun! Jaq, if you'd care for 5 questions back, just stick a request in the comments!

Until Whenever